Space-Public versus Private

Living in another country makes me think about unspoken norms of the US. I am reminded of the difference between American’s concept of personal space versus Ecuadorian’s concept of space. First there is public space. These are parks, busses, markets, etc.  This is not so different from the US. What IS different are the norms around the noise in these spaces…whenever I board the bus bound for a longer trip inevitably there will be music blaring from the speakers or a bad martial arts movie dubbed in Spanish. Or a vendor will board the bus and talk for 45 minutes about a miracle plant that will cure any health illness for only 2 dollars! Or the lady selling potato chips yells loudly, “Papas, papitas a cincuenta centavos!” just as I am dozing off. So I guess that in the US, this would all be frowned upon. “Hey, have some respect, I’m trying to sleep!” But, Ecuadorians don’t see it that way.

Then there is private space-homes, public bathrooms, shops, etc. I have made several cultural snafoos involving private space. The other day, I was out for a run at Parque Carolina. I needed to use the bathroom. Normally you pay 15 cents to use a restroom, but in the park they are public (or so I thought). So, I walk into the restroom, do my business and come out. Boy did I get a talking to by the man running the place. He basically said, “Wow, girl, not even a greeting, not even a good morning, you are so rude, lacking respect, walking into MY bathroom like this.” So, now I need to remember, even if the restroom belongs to the public, I still have to say something like, “Please good sir. lend me your restroom.”

Another place that is different are stores. When you walk in, you always say good morning or good day. Then you ask permission to enter the store. Then you ask the vendor if he/she has the thing you want to buy. Window shopping is kind of frowned upon here. It is an unspoken norm that if you enter the store, you have every intention of buying something.

Homes are the ultimate private space. Now of course this is different in the city versus the countryside. In the countryside, you never ever enter someone’s home without first begging permission, sometimes excusing yourself several times. (Also, there are usually dogs that will keep you away, unless the owner holds onto them). It is understood that you are the guest. In the city, there is also the begging permission before you enter. The other day when I got my internet installed the two guys who installed it asked me several times if they could enter. Each time my response was of course, come in, you are offering me a service that I am paying for!

Ah…so much to learn and remember J